Well, this morning I poked MD awake and asked HIM to take Max out. I did get up, just wanted help with the a.m. crunch. Pup is doing pretty well, he hasn't had an accident in the house in days, and last night he was rolling around on his back when he suddenly stood at attention and ran to the back door! Progress! Lots of treats and pets for his success!

MD is out doing last minute shopping. I'm sticking to the no more buying. I think I'm going to make my challenge of not buying for that last minute festive fix. He is even picking up the butter and milk. Last minute change, the store was out of sweet potatoes, so need milk for mashed potatoes.

I cleaned out the freezer, found lots of leftover ground turkey from Thanksgiving I had made up for the dog. I just threw it out. There wasn't really enough to make manicotti or anything with, and Max is too young for it, but mainly I just didn't want to deal with it. I've got too many emotions around that aren't festive, and I need festive! And everyone around me needs a bit of festive, too!

Christmas has been difficult here the last few years. I miscarried at Christmas, which led to the dog we just lost; MD and my sister's cancer over a recent Christmas; my assault the following Christmas, spending four months in the hospital; now losing the dog two weeks before Christmas. What a mix of feelings!

To top it off, today I received a Christmas package from Enfamil of two large cans and lots of vouchers and gifts. I'm a bit embarrassed, but when the dog was in ICU, they said we would need to feed her Enfamil and baby food when she came home. So in my great HOPE that all would be well, I immediately emailed all the baby sites and explained. I didn't follow up after she died. Now I'm not sure what to do! I know it's expensive and I don't want to dump it, but our need for it passed on with the dog. I may bring it to a woman's shelter. Even in my grief I don't want to waste it.